Arthur Brooks, renowned Harvard professor and well-being expert, has revealed a simple yet powerful formula for achieving a happy marriage. In an appearance on the podcast El arte sutil, he shared what he considers the true secret behind lasting relationships. According to him, he has discovered that passionate love is not the essential ingredient for reaching marital happiness.
The professor has explained that many tend to think that keeping the spark alive is the key to a good life as a couple. However, he has emphasized that this kind of intense love is only an initial stage in the relationship. Over time, he clarified, what matters is not intensity, but deep connection and companionship.
Passion or friendship? The key to a lasting marriage
Brooks has commented that at the beginning of falling in love, neurochemical mechanisms are activated in the brain. Serotonin, dopamine, and other hormones make people experience a kind of romantic euphoria. However, he also stressed that these effects decrease over time and give way to another, more stable kind of bond.
In that sense, he has argued that the happiest marriages are not the most passionate, but those that manage to become a solid friendship. The key is to develop a calm, steady, and generous love based on mutual acceptance. He said that this transformation is "magical" and more powerful than any emotional outburst.
Beyond perfection: The value of sincere companionship in a couple
The expert has pointed out that the goal in a long-term relationship should be to find your best friend in your partner. Brooks has described that love as the one that shows itself in small everyday gestures, like watching television together at the end of the day. For him, happiness lies in sharing life with someone who is there without conditions or excessive expectations.
He also noted that true love is unconditional and is not based on performance or perfection. He highlighted that even in the most ridiculous or difficult moments, a person who truly loves you doesn't leave. "Even if you act like a fool, that person doesn't move from your side," he stated.
The true secret for a happy marriage
In his reflection, Brooks has defended the idea that genuine companionship is the strongest foundation of a happy marriage. It's not about keeping constant fireworks, but about cultivating a secure and loyal relationship. This approach, he said, is the only real trick for a couple to truly work in the long term.
Arthur Brooks's words have had a significant impact among his listeners, since they come from years of research and experience in the field of happiness. By moving away from romantic myths, he has offered a more mature, yet no less hopeful, view of love. His message invites people to value what is essential: commitment, emotional closeness, and shared friendship.